Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
