My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
