That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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