every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
