And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Actions speak louder than pants.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Randomize
