I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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