Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
