Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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