32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
