Tell her she can't have a vagina
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
