Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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