god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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