So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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