hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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