if you like me you must not know who I am
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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