i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
