I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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