I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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