Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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