Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
