I'm really into asian looking animals
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
