Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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