I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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