It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
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