Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
operation harelip BJ is a go
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize