So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
