Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
