Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
