Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You're like the curious george of whores
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
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