Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
