Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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