seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I think I just shit out all my problems.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
