You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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