Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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