It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
