i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
