she smelled like a LAN party
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
