i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
