New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
