carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
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