We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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