another moral hangover. fuck.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
