i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
