Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
