bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
So squirting runs in the family.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize
