flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
