Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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