is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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