it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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