Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
