You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
